Saturday Entertainment

Creating space for fun and entertainment is one of my most difficult areas. I rarely understand what it is I find fun to do and I don't know why this is. What is fun? What is entertaining? If I had to rate this area on a scale of one to ten I'd have to say its at about a two. I'm rating it so low because I generally don't do "fun" things. My focus is usually on work or relaxation. Certainly relaxation is fun to me, sitting in silence for hours is fun for me, but it's certainly not entertaining. It's quite limiting.

I'd love to hear from others what and where they find fun and entertainment in their lives. Is it possible I don't understand the concept?

Today I will stretch myself to discover what is fun and entertaining to me. I'll post what I find at the end of the day.

Well, I tried a few new things today to see if I found them entertaining or fun.

• Hung out at Borders Book store and looked at some art, fashion, and exercise books.
  
• I packed a lunch for a picnic, ate some in my car, some on the nature trails.
• I went to the very short nature trails by my home.
  
• I watched a comedy movie on television
• I spent the day in silence, peacefulness, and contentment.
  
• I drove around and looked at landscaping I enjoyed.
  
• I played around with space planning for a friends loft.
• I made myself and incredible salad for dinner that I enjoyed very much.

In all honesty, I felt like I was pressuring myself to find something fun. I was disappointed that I wasn't really able to. What I enjoyed most about this day was the peace and quiet and the healthy foods that I prepared for myself. Going to the book store and to the nature trails were new things I was trying to see if they were fun. I was thinking that fun and entertainment meant that I needed to "do" something. What I learned today is that fun and entertainment is not necessarily something outside of me, I can be fun and entertained just by enjoying a day alone.

I'm going to raise my rating of fun from the two that I thought it was earlier to an eight. I feel so content this evening, spiritually centered, loving, and peaceful. That's fun!

SETTING MY GOALS

I need to know where I'm going and I won't know if I've gotten there unless I've claimed where and what it is I want to actually create in my life. I'd like to have my goals be as concrete as possible, again, so I know if I've reached them. I will set goals for the seven areas of my life that I believe take all of my focus. My spirituality, romantic relationship, family & friends, my finances, health, career & education and entertainment or having fun. My intention is to create a balance in these areas to the best of my ability and in this lifetime.

SPIRITUAL - To create a personal relationship with God. To learn to trust God with my life. To study religions and learn how others have developed their relationship with God. To look for God every day.

ROMANTIC - Talk kindly. Encourage. Overlook slights and faults. Develop my affectionate side. Be affectionate. Receive affection. Initiate sex. Plan a romantic get away. Plan a romantic evening. Act loving. Show signs of appreciation.

FAMILY - Call Dustin weekly. See Dustin monthly. Plan a family dinner every 2 months. Call Alexis. Do Multiplication with Alexis. Call Derek to see how he's doing. See Derek as successful, happy, prosperous. Make sure that I see Mercedes at least one time per month. Be kind to my father. Call my father once every 2 weeks. Write emails to my father weekly. Call Jeanne and Tim to get together. Meet Anne and Kevin half way for dinner. Do a monthly family email.

FINANCE - Refinance both of our homes to reduce our monthly payments. Apply for the hardship loan. Save 10% of our income. Tithe 10% of our income to wherever we are spiritually fed. Maintain the daily cash logs for both Richard and I. Create new avenues for income. Pray to learn about my financial health in a safe way. Follow the guidance that I am shown to take to the best of my ability.

HEALTH - Create and follow a schedule to go to the grocery store, the fish market, and the Arabic market. Follow the eating plan prescribed by Dr. Paz's office. Set up an exercise program and follow it - make the commitment and stay on schedule. Prioritize exercise. Make doctors appointments as they are needed and show up for those appointments.

CAREER/EDUCATION - School starts next week and I have not determined how I am going to maintain my business and go to graduate school at the same time. Write down my weekly schedule of classes. Follow up on the financial aid.

ENTERTAINMENT/FUN - Plan a night out to the movies. Set up sewing machine in upstairs bedroom and begin working on cashmere blanket project. Walk the labyrinth at the Healing Arts Center. Go to garage sales and find modern furniture to furnish the condo. Staying home and reading a book. Shopping for incredible deals. Spend time outdoors

Today I Choose HEALTH

On a scale of 1 to 10, I would have to rate where I am at in regards to my health at about a 6. In order for this number to be a 10 I need to increase my hemoglobin, recover from a cold, eat according to the eating plan prescribed to me, follow up with my doctors appointments, make a commitment to an exercise regime, and create a balance in my daily schedule.

What I am doing today to improve my health:

• Scheduled a follow up appointment with my doctor to review a medication that is not working and contributing to my problems with anemia.
  
• Began a program to eliminate one of my anti-depressant medications.
  
• Scheduled a mammogram appointment.
• Listened to my hypnosis tape this morning to help me overcome an addiction to sugar and sugar cravings.
  
• I am making a commitment to the Body for Life workout program. I've printed up the workout forms, put it in my food journal folder, and went to the gym.
• I was larger than my cravings today.
  
• 
  

Life's Balancing Act

These are specific areas in my life that I am always going to want to improve on. These areas include; SPIRITUAL, ROMANCE, FRIENDS and FAMILY, FINANCIAL, CAREER/EDUCATION, HEALTH, and FUN.

If I was to rate where I am at in each of these areas on a daily, weekly, or monthly basis, I would then know what areas are needing the most work to help me live my best life and maybe be my best person.

Each day I plan to focus on one of these areas as the primary and the remaining areas as a secondary. I believe this will help me keep in check with myself, and, also give me a week to come up with some solutions to make the following week more positive.

The breakdown will be as follows:

Sunday - Spiritual Monday - Relationships Tuesday - Friends/Family
Wednesday-Financial Thursday - Career/Educ. Friday - Health
Saturday - Entertain

I'll rate each category between 1 and 10, with 1 being in need of great change and 10 being the most fantastic.

This of course means that I am going to need to put together goals for each area so that I will know what it is that I am wanting to achieve and whether or not I am on the path to achieving those goals.

Since I've been focused so much on food, I realize that there are so many other areas that are needing my attention. With food someday's I fail, some days I succeed. The more days I succeed, the closer I am to my goals (not yet determined). The more days I fail, the more help and/or loving attention I am needing to give that area of my life. Its about balance, being out of balance, getting into balance and winding road between.

I'd love to hear from others about how they are taking care of themselves and what is working best for them.

CFM - Day 26

Started my morning by listening to the hypnosis cd. Felt kind of tired and moved in slow motion this morning. Went to clients, had to hang out for a couple hours doing nothing while waiting for contractors to complete their work. Again, felt tired, antisocial, awkward, didn't want to entertain my clients dramas.

Had a shake this morning, packed nuts for the road, had another shake before running out the door to my clients since it was so close to lunch time. While at my clients instead of eating the nuts I packed first, I made myself another shake believing it was my second shake of the day. I did this same thing yesterday also. Very odd.

I'm drinking a lot of water today, and it does taste fantastic! Also, the meal I made for myself last night was so wonderful that I made another one this evening. I should probably add some shrimp to it though so I can stay close on my program

This evening I had problems with sugar cravings and wanted to go out and get some m&m's. I ended up grabbing some tangerines instead. What was great was that ususally when I begin to get into the craving I'm not able to get my mind off of it for very long. I rarely have the thought of something else to take the place of the craving. It was an aha moment to think the thought of the tangerines.

Actually almost craving water. hmmmm

Finally, again had a craving for that elusive "something" and decided to make put together the remaining items on my food plan. It was late so I wasn't overly excited about cooking, but, I had 6 oz of shrimp, and cooked onions and tomatoes in the remaining 4 tsp of oil.

Didn't work out today and I have it my schedule for tomorrow. I'll go after I get out of my second doctors appointment - early evening.

CFM - Day 5

Went to bed at 10:30pm last night then woke at 2:30 wanting something to eat. Had to do some self talk to calm the thoughts down a couple of times.

Set alarm for 8:00, woke up at 8:10. Sat in front of my computer until 10:30 then had a shake with a tsp of oil. When I took my am vitamins and minerals I had an upset stomach so I chased them with some pepto bismol. I'll have to spread them out a bit more so I don't take too many at once.

Packed a peach and 1/4 cup of nuts before I headed out to the gym. Exercised on the elliptical orbiter for 30 minutes, ate the peach and the nuts, then headed into a class called "muscle max" for 30 minutes. The class wasn't very strenuous, but, since I'm returning to the gym after taking quite a bit of time off with anemia and laziness, I'm okay starting back into things slowly.

When I was leaving the gym my mind starting flashing onto candy bars. I had planned to stop at the grocery store on the way home, but decided I needed to get past the craving first. I'll go grocery shopping later if I'm feeling stronger.

Feeling a bit shaky when I returned from the gym (which is why I was craving sugar), I immediately made myself a shake with a tsp of oil. Feeling tired and want to take a nap. I'll try to fight the feeling. (see "Signs that I'm Self Destructing") .

Overcame my urge to take a nap and decided to get some work done instead. I regained energy and was able to complete several things that were overdue. I had another peach at 3:30 and was feeling levelled out energy wise.

My husband and I went grocery shopping at 4:30. It took us 2 hours to get through the task. By the end of the trip at the store I was feeling tired and hungry. I held off the hunger with a stick of gum because I knew I'd be home soon and make a salad.

By the time I got home I was crabby, confrontational and argumentative towards my husband. Even before I put away the groceries I was making a salad. I threw the Lentil soup in the micro(it was already measured out) , my husband started cooking the orange roughie, I heated up 1/2 cup of brown rice, cut up a carrott added 2 tsp of oil to the salad and immediately sat down to eat. Even though I've just completed that meal, I still feel a bit shaky and weak. I'm tired and my resistance to eating healthy is down. I'll grab a glass of water to see if that will help me feel full.

Earlier, while making the salad, I began to think that I could eat extra servings of peanuts. I ended up measuring out 4 servings of peanuts, packaging them in individual baggies and put them away in the cupboard. I also packaged two salads for tomorrow and Friday. I'll have a leftover 6 ounce serving of Orange Roughie for tomorrow also.

Its 8:30 pm and I didn't make it through the evening without going off the plan. I've had an apple and 1 cup of peanuts. The apples not bad, but the peanuts - 159 per 1/4 cup. Ouch! 9:15 ate another peach. 9:30 another 1/2 cup of peanuts. Can't seem to get a handle on this. I'm going to go to bed and read and see if that helps me to stop.

Went to bed at 10:30 but than stayed up until 12:00am playing cards on the computer. Plan on getting up at 7am. I can see the slippey slope and am ready to slow it down. Rough Day.

CFM - Day 2

July 22: I've prepared much of the foods I'll be needing for the next few days. Brown Rice, Cooked Shrimp, Lentil Soup, Salad, and measured and packaged nuts. Then I went to the gym for a 45 minute workout. This morning I had a shake for breakfast later I had a serving of nuts. Before I went to the gym I had another shake with a tsp. of oil. After I got back from the gym I had 1/2 cup of lentil soup. For dinner I ate a salad with red wine vinegar and 3 tsp of oil, a carrot, 6 oz of shrimp and 1/2 cup of brown rice. I'm finishing off the day with 2 servings of fruit, an apple and a cup of raspberries.

Success!

CFM - Day 1

July 21: Today I woke up at 11:30 a.m., ate 2 pieces of Pizza Hut Pizza and 2 cups of coffee. Couple hours later I ate 1/4 cup of pumpkin seeds, an apple and a glass of water and FINALLY (its been a month) went to the gym. I worked out on the elliptical for 45 minutes! Then I ate sushi california roll and some other kind of roll I don't know the name of. I also ate a large bowl of grapes. Later when my husband went to work I was wanting to just munch on something - chocolate preferably, but, since there wasn't any in the house and I didn't want to go out and get some, I ate another bowl of grapes and another piece of pizza and a piece of garlic bread (that I didn't really like because it was dry) . Still craving chocolate I made myself a chocolate protein shake. Went to bed about 11:00 with a diet coke and 1/2 cup of pumpkin seeds.

Although this doesn't sound like too terrible of a day, I'm not even close to the eating plan I've been given to follow by my doctor. I'll try again on Sunday.